Has Having a Baby Given You the Baby Body Blues?
You arent alone…having a baby can be hard on the body. However, instead of feeling down and out about looking different, use this time as a start to looking differently about your body!
It never occurred to me before having children, just how wonderful and amazing the female body is. Before I decided to allow children to forever alter the shape I had worked a lifetime to keep, I monitored everything I ate or drink (only water), ate cereal for breakfast and worked out every opportunity I got. I called it staying healthy, but I realize now that I was motivated by the fact that I believed at some level of my womanhood – that the world would end if I grew out of my favorite sized jeans. Fast forward 9 months, 50+ (real amounts do not need to be disclosed) carrying twins plus an extreme case of pre-eclampsia that actually made me gain weight after delivery – and you have the recipe for post partum depression and remorse. Surprising though, that isn’t what happened.
Most women are concerned during pregnancy about gaining too much weight. They also worry what they will look like after they have a baby. There are so many preconceived notions about spreading nose and hips that pregnancy can be stressful to a woman worried about her appearance. However, there is another way to look at things. There will also be some ‘loser’ who asks you when you are due – two weeks after you gave birth. There will always be yummy mummies and a media obsessed with how a wife and mother should look. But what counts is what you think and feel about yourself.
Sure, it is frustrating to gain weight and see changes. But instead of dwelling on that, you have to take a look at what you just accomplished. You have to be realistic about how hard your body just worked in order to give birth to something as complex and perfect as another human being. You also have to learn to realize that you are much more than perfect hair, tan lines, and a ‘favorite size’ of jeans. While you might be worried that your husband doesn’t find you attractive, surveys show that that is not the case. In fact, many men like to see their wife with more curves and are so impressed by the feats of pregnancy and childbirth that they desire you even more. So even if you have a C-section scar or a stretch mark or two (or three or four) – it is your confidence that will speak volumes to your spouse and others. Just because you are a mother, and perhaps have experienced some changes to your body, doesn’t mean you have something to feel bad about or hide from. Instead, embrace it.
Throw out your old clothes. Why? Because you are starting a brand new sort of life and you deserve new clothes to go along with it. Rather than reading a scale or trying to fit into sizes, try to be and stay healthy emotionally and physically. Life isn’t about watching everything you eat and feeling bad about enjoying Aunt Becky’s cheesecake. Rather than let your body be something that brings you down, start giving it the respect it deserves! You just had a baby. Yeah, people do it every day – but still…you just had a baby. How amazing are you? How amazing is that?
If you had a daughter, you have to decide that now is the time to accept yourself even more. As they grow up they will be constantly judging themselves based on the way you feel about yourself. The best thing you can do for your child is to empower them to be healthy and to feel good about the way they look, even if they aren’t magazine perfect. After all who is?
Be proud of yourself. Stop dwelling on a few pounds. Embrace your new body and all the curves that come with it and realize for once how perfectly amazing your body (inside and out) really is. That’s what I did. I can say that I have never been quite as small as I was before I had my children. But I can also say that I have never been as happy or as proud of being a woman as I am now.
